Pelvic Pain During Intimacy? Here’s What Could Be Going On
Experiencing pelvic pain during intimacy can be frustrating, confusing, and emotionally draining. Whether it’s a new issue or something you’ve dealt with for years, know this: you’re not alone, and it’s not all in your head. Roughly three out of four women experience painful sex at some point in their lives, and the causes vary widely.
Understanding the root of the discomfort is the first step toward finding relief. Below, we’ll explore common medical and emotional factors and what you can do to feel better.
Understanding What It Is
Pelvic pain during intimacy refers to discomfort in the lower abdomen, vaginal area, or deep within the pelvis that occurs before, during, or after intercourse. The medical term for this is dyspareunia, and it can range from a dull ache to a sharp, stabbing pain.
This issue can affect people of all ages, regardless of sexual orientation or relationship status.
Common Causes of Painful Sex
Many people assume that discomfort during sex is just “part of getting older” or something they have to accept. That’s not true. There are real, treatable reasons behind the pain. Here are some common causes of pelvic pain during intimacy:
Vaginal dryness: Often due to hormonal changes during menopause, postpartum, or while breastfeeding.
Endometriosis: A condition where tissue similar to the uterine lining grows outside the uterus, causing deep pain.
Vaginismus: Involuntary tightening of the vaginal muscles, which can make penetration painful.
Infections: Yeast infections, UTIs, or STIs can all contribute to painful sex.
Pelvic Floor Dysfunction: When the muscles supporting your pelvic organs are too tight, too weak, or poorly coordinated.
Emotional Stress and/or Trauma: Anxiety, past sexual trauma, or unresolved relationship issues can manifest as physical pain.
When Should You See a Healthcare Provider?
Many people delay talking to a healthcare provider about painful sex, but early intervention can make a big difference. If the pain is persistent or affecting your well-being, don’t wait.
Here’s how to prepare for a productive conversation:
Track the pain: Note when it happens, where it hurts, how it feels, and how long it lasts.
Write down your symptoms: Include related issues like spotting, urinary problems, or mood changes.
Have a list of your medications: Some medications, such as antidepressants or hormonal treatments, may contribute to the issue.
Be open and honest: A good provider won’t judge. Honesty helps them help you.
Ask about the options available to you: Solutions may include pelvic floor therapy, medication, or counseling.
Tips to Ease the Pain
Medical treatment is often key, but certain strategies may help reduce discomfort in the meantime:
Use a high-quality water-based lubricant to reduce friction.
Prioritize foreplay—arousal increases natural lubrication and comfort.
Experiment with different positions to find what feels best for your body.
Try relaxation techniques or pelvic floor exercises to reduce tension.
Consider working with a pelvic floor physical therapist.
Pelvic pain during intimacy is more common than many people realize, and you don’t have to suffer in silence. Whether the cause is physical, emotional, or a mix of both, relief is possible. Identifying the issue is the first step toward healing.
Get Some Answers
If you’ve been silently enduring dyspareunia, you deserve support and answers. Taking that first step—making an appointment, tracking your symptoms, or simply acknowledging the problem—can be life-changing.
Your body is sending you a message, and it’s worth listening to. If you’re experiencing pelvic pain during intimacy, reach out to a compassionate healthcare provider who understands pelvic health. You’re not broken. You’re not alone. With the right care, you can rediscover comfort and connection.
If you’re not sure where to begin, consider scheduling a consultation with a pelvic health specialist or OB/GYN. It’s not just about solving the pain—it’s about reclaiming your well-being and confidence.